The meaning of our communication relies on the response that we get from others once the communication occured. If the recipients understand the meaning of the conveyed messages, then the communication can be deemed as an effective one. But when it goes another way around, there must be something to look at. Therefore, evaluate ourself in communicating before pointing fingers to others.
As stated above, if the responses are not as expected, there are two things that might be wrong or missed. They are:
- The messages or words are not clear enough for others to understand (what)
- The way we deliver the messages does not suit the style of others (how)
In order to have the messages to be understood by others, ensure that we are communicating in accordance with others’ preferred style, i.e. Expressive, Amiable, Direct or Analytical. The four-style in communication is well known as Business Behaviour Styles (BBS). This will be discussed in separate article. Meanwhile, prevent ourself from generalizing others when it comes to communicate. Some love data in details (head) others might love small talk and pure relationship in communication (heart). Do know others and be CURIOUS!
Treat others as THEY want to be treated.
In one training, a senior manager ended his presentation and humbly asked, “Do you have any questions in regards to what I’ve presented to you?”. Subsequently, one participant excitedly asked a question and this question was directly answered by the manager. The manager then threw question to others whether they have more questions in mind or not. No one was answering. No questions from them.
The same thing happened again. One presented and then no questions or even no comments. But the second presenter gave a striking comment to the participant. Here is the comment that I learned.
By not asking or commenting to anything that has been presented does not surely mean that you are all smart. But by not communicating, the top management would ask about your contribution to the company if you can’t present your ideas. They will be wondering why should they invite you to the meeting if you don’t have any contribution. Next time, you will surely won’t be invited.
Giving an “intelligent” question is not as easy as it seems. That’s why the management will require a person who have the ability of asking smart question or giving constructive comment to the fact that has been provided.
By being silence means you’re communicating among the two: you perfectly understand the idea or you totally have no idea of the issues. Therefore, it’s much better for you to put attention to the presentation and ask question or give comments accordingly.
Remember: You cannot not communicate. Everyone will have a judgment toward your way of communication, even its a silence.